Not Ready

There are so many times when I have something to say and I want to capture it on here. But, sometimes I’m just not ready to say it.

I’ve had this post in mind for about a week now, but it’s a dark thought and I know that once I type it down then it means that it’s real.

At least, that’s how it works for me.

It would be simple for me to type up the words, they’re already ingrained in my mind. But I feel this invisible pull to keep those thoughts in this quiet, dark corner…where they’re safe and they can’t hurt anyone. Especially not me.

Writing, for me, is like smearing my DNA all over a page. Or in this case, the internet. This is the stuff that I don’t say out loud. This is the stuff that clutters my mind and keeps me up at night. This is the very spine of who I am, of what I think and believe. It’s my truth.

As far as I’m concerned, I’m just a bunch of words and phrases stuck together, made to look human. Wherever I touch, I leave a trail of mismatched words and a littering of lyrics.

Anyway, this is just my way of saying that I have something to tell you. I’m just not ready to say it.

 

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